Penis and Vagina

Gender, Sex and Compulsory Heterosexuality Hierarchies

An expecting mother is on her way to visit the doctor where she will find out her child’s sex. She will finally know whether her child will have a penis or a vagina. The fact that in just a few moments she will know for sure if this youngster will have eggs or sperms. This excites her because this will help her a great deal in planning a baby shower. The gender will assist her in deciding whether to have pink or blue decorations. This piece of information is the key that will let the guest know whether to buy dresses or pants. Of course this baby will be heterosexual, anything other than that hasn’t even crossed her mind. We live in a compulsory heterosexual society where anything that goes beyond attraction of the opposite sex is taboo or away from the “norms” and that is always a problem. The idea that society associate heterosexual as natural was introduced by Adrienne Rich in 1980. The “norm” is a big part of our society and anything that exceeds that is always question. South African runner Caster Semenya won the 800-meter in 2009 World Athletics Championships in Berlin, and she had to take a medical sex test. We grew up on fairytales in a heterosexual world, be careful not to ever think of changing our perfect family structure of a man and a woman because that would ruin everything. This soon to be mother better hope that her child comes out normal.
As children we are generally taught early on depending on individuals parenting styles about the difference in anatomy between girls and boys. As they move on to middle school children get further informed on the internal difference between a male and a female which are the reproductive organs. South African runner Caster Semenya was indeed born a female but just because she appeared masculine in appearance and did not fit the ideal image of a female her sex was questioned. Not only questioned after she effortlessly won the 800-meter race in the Berlin Championship, she had to take a medical sex test. I remember at the end of my senior year of high school my gym class had to take a fitness test. I was the only girl in the class that kept up and eventually did better than the boys in my class and it became a big surprise to everyone just because I am a female. In that very same class I noticed that some of the other girls could have done way better than they actually did, but they act as if they were ashamed to show any type of strength because they are girls.
It’s nothing new that when it comes to the two genders male and female, society has its own view of what is acceptable or normal behavior for each gender. Females should behave feminine while men are seen as masculine. There are certain traits that go along with each gender and if someone were to posses or show any sign that belongs to the opposing gender then they are out of the “norm.” Growing up we’re taught that girls are just these delicate flowers, and we can’t do anything but cook and take care of children. That’s why our mothers keep us in the house and to do chores like cooking and cleaning while the boy goes and play sports. As long as I can remember I have never been interested in cooking, my mother is still trying to teach me to cook at the age of 21. And she never fails to ask me “How are you ever going to keep a husband when you don’t cook or clean?” and I always reply “My husband is going to cook for me.” I’m sure that she means that in the best way possible but it just shows how women are and have been perceived for generations.
In 1980 Adrienne Rich introduced “Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence” where she explores society’s assumption that everyone is heterosexual. Heterosexuality is forced upon women because it is put in every little girl’s head that they’re suppose to get married to a man and have children in order to build an acceptable family structure. Women are looked as less important by men we’re constantly degraded in the media in ad in magazines and when we think of famous women in society sex comes to mind. There’s a billion dollar porn industry that does nothing but show that men are dominant and women are just good for pleasure.
Most girls grew up watching or at least hearing about fairytales that tells us that one day we’re going to be swept off our feet by a man and live happily ever after. Nowhere in these fairytales do I ever hear of Cinderella meeting Snow White, falling in love and living happily ever after. If any little boy were to have visions Prince Charming instead of Cinderella, he will no longer be considered a part of society’s “norms” and therefore he must be sick.
It’s in our magazines it’s on our televisions these stereotypes and labels that we have that’s separating males from females and separating us as people. Even before the nine months are up in a pregnancy labels are already being placed on us depending on what sex we are. Later in our own house we are taught what being a lady is and the traits that comes with each gender. Divorce ratings are going up and more and more people are complaining about being single. But how can we find a person to live happily ever after with when we’re so limited and concerned with label.


P.S this is a paper I wrote for my inquiry got a A on it:)